@JasonLastname: Whoever invented popcorn deserves the Medal of Honor for not panicking after the first 45 seconds.
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@Shock_Monster: HR: Let's talk about why you were late today. Me: I told you! HR: DRAGONS AREN'T "RELIABLE TRANSPORTATION!" Me: Duh. That's why I was late.
@SortaBad: Today I'm approaching teens dressed like I'm from the future, locking eyes, and saying "Happy Presidents Day, sir" with a wink