@daplusk: Whoever invented the forklift over estimated the weight of forks
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JohnFugelsang: My favorite Bible story is when Jesus feeds the multitudes after administering a drug test to make sure they deserve food.
@VeggieMonger: Someone suggested that I try Acupuncture. I don't think adding more pricks will make a difference.
@Kim_pulsive: I plan to scary-haunt anyone who says "she wouldn't want us to be sad" at my funeral. If you're not sad that I'm gone forever you deserve it
@joejwest: [traffic jam] MAN: [rolls down window] Dude, why? ME: [in the next car holding a rabbit as it repeatedly kicks the horn] It's his birthday