@TheAlexNevil: Whoever said "Just showing up is half the battle" (a) didn't understand battles and (b) probably died quickly after showing up.
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@SkinnerSteven: That old expression: "hold the phone!" doesn't work anymore because everyone is already doing that
@Quartzjixler: I hope the mysterious food thief at the office enjoys the dog food marinara and Jello with my toenail clippings I made for him/her.
@girl_a_whirl: His icy glare melts my creamy core. He's so cold, beads of water drip down his exterior. My walls ache to be drowned by him. -Oreo to milk
@TheRolo: [Ouija board] Me: Demon? I-W-I-L-L-E-A-T-Y-O-U-R-E-S-O-U-L Me: *your Y-O-U-K-N-O-W W-H-A-T-I-D-O-N-T-W-A-N-T-Y-O-U-R-S-O-U-L-A-N-Y-M-O-R-E