@whisperedjoy: Whomever came up with the saying "Make love not war" was obviously not married.
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@theroneman: [stacks of books on floor] Impressive, son. [son places pizza on one stack, soda & cookies on others] "Yep; perfect height" [turns on Xbox]
@TheMichaelRock: Me: Be back after lunch! Boss: OK Me: *texts boss APRIL FOOLS LOL* *goes home, turns on baseball*