@katlamcglynn: Why are books the only thing advertised as "Wherever books are sold." You can't sell other stuff by saying "Wherever you get this shit, IDK"
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@Lunatic_times: when the lady in the elevator burst into tears I did the only thing a man could do in the situation. I fell to the floor and played dead.
@envydatropic: I will never have to admit to a mistake at work when I can blame the last person who quit
@Cheeseboy22: My son just told me he's changing his clock to military time so he can stay up later. He is not a smart boy.
@Stellacopter: I bet if you walked up to any table at a restaurant and said "Good afternoon folks" they will let you take their order.