@MarfSalvador: [climbing inside trojan horse] general: NO, THE WOODEN ONE!

@girl_a_whirl: Mr & Mrs Smith is my favorite movie about how trying to kill your spouse & demolishing your house can bring the magic back to your marriage

@DurtMcHurtt: An octopus should have eightacles, not ten.

@bobinhiding: My driver's side window is stuck closed. I may starve to death.

@mrjohndarby: [date] me: so if u could change any part of your body what would it be? her: *laughing* I guess my ankles. what about you? me: well, u know the bit behind the knees? *awkward silence* me: *leans in closer* I'd love em to be as hairy as armpits