@TheMichaelRock: Why are people pissed off that Justin Bieber smoked some weed? It's not like he released another album or anything.
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@squirrel74wkgn: UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP UNZIP - ZIP *looking for condom in my "Beat It" zipper jacket*
@Brampersandon_: ME: I fell off a 50 ft tall ladder once GIRL: holy cow how did you survive ME: I fell off the bottom rung
@YikYakApp: "Someone offered me grapes, but I declined . I'm not used to consuming wine in pill form." — University of Chicago
@OBiiieeee: HOLD YOUR HORSES. TELL YOUR HORSES YOU LOVE THEM. DONT BE TOO STRICT WITH YOUR HORSES OR THEY'LL DATE OLDER HORSES GET TATTOOS & HAVE PONIES