@heatherlou_: Why are people still calling my phone I thought we covered this at orientation...
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@AimeeHelene1: If this paper cut is any indication of my pain threshold, then child birth would definitely kill me.
@laurenmacdonald: If I give my dog a toy that doesn't make an unbearably annoying noise she looks at me like I have no clue how to do anything right in life.
@figgled: Me: don't 🙏🏼 judge 💜 other 🌈 people 💕 be kind ✌🏼😇 Also me: anyone who likes the new Taylor Swift song has a rotten brain parasite
@BradBroaddus: I overheard my neighbor tell someone on the phone that I was creepy. I was so mad I almost crawled out from under the bed & confronted her.