@mattsurely: Why are you even asking me that mom. I love jumping off bridges, either by myself or as a group, you know that.
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@living_marble: MEN: we're gonna stop flirting at work and giving unasked-for hugs WOMEN: great MEN: wait, no, you don't understand, those were threats
@KissabiX: My friends car got stolen and was handed back littered with evidence of drugs. Great, now a car is having a more interesting life than I.
@philandher96: Trying to make pancakes this morning and it turns out I didn't get the spatula in the divorce.