@E_lok44: "Why can't I just eat the wax?"
~me, when I can't open the cheese
@Kyle1092: There's a police officer trying to get me to roll down my window.
I'm calling the cops.
@Thedudish: The best way to dry off a wet baby is to leave him in a jar of rice overnight.
@trevso_electric: I got this "breathe" tattoo on my wrist because I don't have a central nervous system and it's a helpful reminder.
@cray_at_home_ma: Hubs: Kids are still asleep! Know what that means?
Me: We have to be quick!
*Runs to the hidden box of Cocoa Puffs and pours 2 big bowls*
@hythemafia: *Food hits floor*
Little Germs: "Let's get it!"
King Germ: "No!!! We must wait 5 seconds......"