@TheMichaelRock: Why did you have to take a half naked picture in front of a full length mirror to show off your new haircut?
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@GashleyMadison: "For a really awkward time, call me." -me, leaving my number on bathroom stalls.
@MK_Shenanigans: I forgot FB was not Twitter & posted something ultra dirty. Now I have to avoid my granndma, change my hair color & leave the state.
@BobTheSuit: CIA: So what did you call that new tracking software we put on everyone's iPhone? NSA: "U2's New Album"