@Storminika: Why do people knock on a locked public restroom door? And what is the person inside to say? "who is it?"
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@Lerky: WHAT DO WE WANT? RACE CAR NOISES!!! WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?? NEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
@WhaJoTalkinBout: [Petco] INTERVIEWER: We're looking for a real fish person. ME: Like a mermaid? INTERVIEWER:
@justabloodygame: No one sleeps with Gandalf because it takes him until first light on the fifth day to come.
@TheToddWilliams: [Thanksgiving dinner] WIFE: These potatoes are burnt to a crisp ME: Those are for tomorrow WIFE: Because…tomorrow is Bla- ME: Black Fry Day