@brendohare: Why do people say "Cannonball" when jumping into a pool, but no one says "I'm jumping into a pool" when firing a cannonball #Interesting
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@UncleDuke1969: He rose from mild mannered Social Studies teacher... To vicious kingpin of a criminal cupcake empire. Coming soon to AMC: "BAKING BRAD"
@ashlar36: I'm going to complain about the cold until a Canadian gets mad enough to say something rude, like 'I'm sorry but it's colder in Canada."
@Elizasoul80: Turn your trip to the grocery store into a ninja challenge by shopping strictly out of other people's carts when they're not looking.
@Beerhaze: Neighbour mowed his lawn at 6am... Logic dictates that I should get drunk in the backyard tonight and try to learn to play the didgeridoo.