@Parker_Simpson: Why do people say,"You can't make this stuff up." Nope. Not true at all. You can literally make up anything you want anytime.
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@alextranquada: A black shape emerges from your attic; all you can see are claws. You’ve made $4000 in 30 minutes working from home, but at what cost?
@AngelaEhh: When people say 'oh, you're still single?' I like to reply with 'wow, you're still married?' I'm popular.
@AudreyPorne: If you drink 6 RedBulls in less than an hour, they're not allowed to arrest you for stealing a bus. Read the can if you don't believe me.