@GoldenSpirals: Why do they call it a "shit-eating grin"? I don't think I'd be smiling if I was eating shit.
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@duplicitron: Hey lady I have bad news for you someone thought your hair was noodles and left their chopsticks in it.
@PeaceInTruth1: Telemarketer: Good afternoon, Sir. Me: Do you walk with a limp? Telemarketer: No. Me: Want to? Telemarketer: Thank you for your time.
@MandiAtRandom: Might be time to get in shape. Halfway up these stairs and I'm considering setting up base camp and trying again in the morning.