@weedguy420boner: why do we park in the driveway but fetishize an impossible and ridiculous masculinity on the hemingway
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@CountGripsnatch: Me: I should stop drinking Me: Why? Me: I dunno Me: You're awesome when you drink Me: Really? Me: Yeah Me: Thanks, me. You're alright
@TodaysResume: During your interview, try ending every sentence with "dot jpg". "How would you say you handle job pressure?" --Not a problem.jpg
@noog: One time I made a snowman and gave him a cucumber nose. Carrot noses are the standard protocol but I'm what u would call a rebel.
@jenyb4: The only way I'd want to watch a video of you pouring a bucket of ice water over your head is if you promise you drown at the end.