@robdelaney: Why DOES "February" have that extra R? It should just be "Februay."
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@daemonic3: 911: What's your emergency? "I put the Ford in affordable housing." 911: Are you flirting? "No I crashed into some apartments. SEND HELP"
@Mr_goose007: If I ever go missing, please put my photo on a Tequila bottle because nobody I know drinks milk.
@Smug_Lemur: Good job with the heavy sighs, guy behind me, that should definitely help speed up the line.
@ThaJawn: Hipster: Check out my mini.. Me: *snatches and eats Hipster:.. Bonsai tree Me: *swallows* It's alright for a veggie Hipster: Me: anymore?