@laurascaz: Why does James Bond keep telling people his real name? Worst. Spy. Ever.
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@chrisdowning: When something at the hardware store says it's universal, that means it will fit every model on the market except the one you have.
@Lisa_Laughs_: They're not all brilliant, but they're all mine. Meaning my tweets, and maybe my kids, whatever.
@MomOnFire: One day, when my kids are grown with their own homes, I'll come over, grind food into all of their keyboards and lie about it.