@theshantilly: Why does laundry happen to good people?
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@thepunningman: "Why do you wanna work at Clickbait Enterprises?" Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"
@TheBoydP: Spoiler alert: Sometimes accountants are boring on purpose because we think it’s funny when we see people’s eyes glaze over.
@hazelmotes1: My daughter doesn't know I put the last pudding cup in her lunch earlier this evening, so she won't know I took it out and am eating it now.
@timcarvell: Now that it's abandoned nudes, I hope Playboy goes with its other major brand identity and becomes a magazine about a very fancy rabbit.