@moose_chocolate: Why does the media always call a stabbing incident a "violent" stabbing incident? Is it possible to stab someone non-violently?
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@POTerritory: Him: The dog ate your take-home final? Me: Yeah. Him: So what happened? Me: Well, a few hours later- Him: Oh, no. Me: -he passed the test.
@RobertJrDowney: Just imagine if Usain Bolt was your father and you were trying to run away from a beating.
@PetrickSara: Welcome back to school kids. Please form an orderly line. If you don't already have a highly contagious virus, one will be assigned to you.