@joeljeffrey: Why don't they just get Jehovah's Witnesses to deliver the mail?
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@kDuncanG: MAYBE PEACH JUST LIKES BOWSER A LOT AND WE'RE FOLLOWING A NARRATIVE OF MARIO THE DELUSIONAL HOMEWRECKER. *cops pull me from operating room*
@rose24_em: He whispered in my ear that he liked being called daddy. I whispered back that I liked being called a cab.
@LindaInDisguise: Coworker: What was your college major? Me: How to avoid student-loan debt, with a minor in teen pregnancy.