@mrjohntofu: Why even name your cat, it's not going to listen to you.
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@Cheeseboy22: Pretty disappointed to find out that "Toys for Tots" isn't a program where I trade my kids's toys for delicious tater tots.
@imadepoopstoday: Walk up to someone drinking coffee and ask them if their coffee tastes different today. Then smile and walk away.
@FuttyNudgekins: When I see a self-help book at a secondhand store, I wonder...does that mean it worked, or it is bullshit?