@TheDairylandDon: Why hunt for vampires when you can just open a tuxedo shop and have them come to you? Work smarter, not harder.
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@Donna_McCoy: No honey, there isn't a neighbor working with a nail gun this early. That was just my knees creaking when I got out of bed.
@Book_Krazy: Son: I have to bring a giraffe to school tomorrow Hub: *types in zoo coordinates & grabs keys* Me: He means a graph Hub: I GOT THIS HONEY
@Parentpains: My wife said she wished she never woke up this morning. Turns out we do have something in common.
@sixfootcandy: You'd think my hair would be a little more cooperative considering how many times I blow it per week.