@IamEnidColeslaw: why is Charmin trying to get us comfortable with bears? HELLO THEY EAT PEOPLE
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@tchrquotes: Superman: I got this Batman: I'll help S: Look, you just slow me down B: I'm a detective S: ... B: I have batarangs S: Do you hear yourself?
@SpacePlankton: Just accidentally flashed my gay neighbor. He's not gay anymore. HAHAHAHAHA! Just kidding. He totally threw up.
@Roweboat13G: *boss stops meeting* Mike, is there something you'ld like to share with the whole group? Me: Nooooo, that's why I whispered it to Alan.
@darinlovesbacon: Your honor I object! That other lawyer is saying stuff that makes my client look guilty