@rickolantern: Why is Halloween considered the scariest time of the year? Most weddings happen in June.
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@just1fool: I'd like to thank the spider that descended from the bill of my baseball cap for getting me motivated today.
@Tmoney68: When someone tells me, "I think of you as family," I assume I'm about to be yelled at for something that happened 10 years ago.
@Diversion50: I once had an epileptic fit during my turn at a game of charades. Everyone just kept yelling, "HOW MANY WORDS?" and "IS IT THE EXORCIST?".