@SkinnerSteven: Why is it called a 'dad-bod' and not a 'father-figure'?
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@StellaGMaddox: I get so excited when Facebook tells me there are hot singles in my city who want to meet me. Maybe they want to babysit!
@JermHimselfish: Dance like nobody's watching. Paint like your girlfriend doesn't text you too much. Sing like you didn't struggle with algebra in 9th grade.
@TheIronSherk: *turns on deep-fryer* *tosses in chicken nuggets* *adds chamomile and lavender* *recites from the Book of Shadows* Voila, Wiccan Nuggets