@philco816: Why is this wet? Just one of the fun games you get to play as a parent.
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@GrowlyGrego: [spelling bee] Your word is "spider" Can you use it in a sentence? "A spider has eight eyes." [kid smiles] Spider. S-P-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-D-E-R
@thenatewolf: *Orders pizza* What a night *Phone buzzes* And a text? Killing it *checks phone* ok that was the pizza confirmation but still cruising
@dlsims01: A woman always gets the last word in an argument, because anything a man says after that is the first words in a new argument.