@fro_vo: why isn't thunder called soundning
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@andreahardy33: Just realized the girl I flipped off in the parking lot is in my next class.. This could be awkward.
@EJGomez: "911? Yes I need to report an incident" "What is it mam?" "THIS. GIRL. IS. ON. FIRE!" "Getting real tired of this crap, Alicia."
@brunopieroni: Just ran into Björk walking into her hjötel. Ljöking fjörward to her show at Pitchfjörk tjönight (hjöly shit my Icelandic is pjërfect).
@junejuly12: Apparently "if you must draw your eyebrows on, please draw them evenly" was not the tip this waitress was expecting.