@gvicks: Why let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance?
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@shatty48: Don't ever look away from a police officer. Just stare him down. You don't wanna look suspicious.
@pakalupapito: out of all my body parts, I'm sure my eyes are in the best shape. I do at least 463 eye rolls a day.
@mommy_cusses: Motherhood is when your child looks like a sparkling cherub and you look like a steaming pile of nope.
@DanielRCarrillo: Having pets adds 5 years to your life. Have thousands of pets, never stop owning pets. Become immortal. Laugh as your foes grow old and die