@lovemydogduck: Why periods? Why can't mother nature just tweet me and be like "Waddup girl. You ain't pregnant. Have a great week. Talk to you next month"
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@robyn_vo: Dad: HEY come here, did you go to school with this guy on tv? Me: Dad, that's Spongebob Squarepants Dad: Must've been in your sister's class
@TimODee16: Remember when “anyone can grow up to be President” was aspirational, not an existential threat?
@djdarrellripley: My online therapist says you can't live your life in fear....He also sells shampoo.