@SolelyB: Why pink camo? Do people hunt barbie jeeps or try to sneak up on pepto bismol?
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@MattchooFitz: "Matt, you just need to date the type of person that will always be there for you!" [tries to date pizza] [gets friend calzoned]
@blondecalamity: Someone should have warned me, that when you have kids, they talk to you, like, ALL. THE. TIME.
@0point5twins: "Is that your dog?" "No, actually she's adopted... we were unable to conceive a dog naturally ourselves"