@SwoonTwang: Why would a needle even be in a haystack? Who sews in a barn?
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@SamuelMoen: When I die, my only wish is for my corpse to be respectfully catapulted onto a whitewater raft of people going down the Colorado river
@Leemanish: "You know where you are? You're in the jungle, baby. You gonna DIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!! ...Only Kidding! Welcome to Red Lobster, party of 2?"
@SaltyCorpse: You're not a real parent until you've secretly wished your child's sports team does bad in a tournament so you can go home early.