@MentalAbortions: Why would I want to quit smoking? Oh, to live longer. Why would I want to live longer?
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@3sunzzz: Teacher: Bob, how do you make a nail plural? Dumb Bob: You add S. T: *amazed* Yes! Come up to the board and show us. DB: [writes] SNAIL
@donni: DEFENSE: Your Honor, will you allow my client to escape? JUDGE: I'll allow it PROSECUTOR: Aw WTF JUDGE: Let's see where he goes with this