@highwaytohelv: why yes i studied sports medicine at the university of phoenix. *puts stethoscope on basketball, nods*
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@WheelTod: [Date] Her: Any hobbies? Me: Monging mostly. Her: Huh? Me: I'm a monger Her: Huh? Me: Iron, fish, war... You name it -- I'll monger it
@RobDenBleyker: If you commit a crime be sure to wear running clothes, so if you need to flee the scene cops will just think "Look at that healthy jogger"
@Brampersandon_: ME: *packing my bags* WIFE: let's talk about this ME (still mad she didn't get the cereal with the toy inside): theres nothing to talk about