@amishschool: Wife leaves keys on counter with a helpful note saying "keys" in case I thought they were llamas.
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@jollyrobber: Dude's trunk just popped open in front of me on the expressway ramp. I instinctively looked to see if any of you were in there.
@daryl_licked: Indian Chief: What that bottle of vodka for? Me: I got it for my girlfriend. Indian Chief: Good trade.