@ImKevinito: Wifey is pregnant again. She wants a girl but I want a black guy so I have someone to play basketball with.
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@Douchekevin: Never mind trying to scare me about going to hell religious people, it won't work. I was married for 6 years.
@rolldiggity: I never feel guilty about eating baby carrots because it's not like adult carrots are doing anything great with their lives.
@_blotty: [ocean's 11 music] So here's the plan,we iron me flat, then slide me into an ATM via the card slot. Once inside, it's a cash playground boys
@AnkCoupleTO: Embrace her crazy and she'll love you forever or until she kills you, whichever comes first