@flashember: [Wildebeest orbiting the earth in a spacesuit, uselessly kicking its legs madly every time a really grassy part comes into view]
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@tinytittays: Driving with me is like being trapped in a tiny karaoke bar that doesn't serve booze and the worst singer won't get off the stage.
@NervousJr: Snow White is my favorite Disney movie about a man trying to hook up with a woman who just wants to sleep.
@MouVanLee: Reasons why i never let my girlfriend touch my iPhone. 1) I don't have iPhone. 2) I don't have a girlfriend.