@DevilryFun: Wish a poltergeist would move in so there'd be someone else to blame when I lose my shit.
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@MrJohnNorris: WHEN I SEE ALL CAPS I READ LIKE THE PERSON IS TALKING RIGHT BY A JET ENGINE, TELLING A CIA AGENT THAT HIS PLAN WON'T WORK...IT'S TOO RISKY
@samalmightysam: What I learned from Titanic was that u need to have sex as soon as possilble with the person u like cause u never know what might happen.
@Shut_up_Marissa: Me: I'm so tired. Phone: Put me down and go to sleep. Me and Phone: HAHAHAHAHA!
@sploosk: ME: I need to pee really bad TEACHER: can you hold it? ME: probably not. my hands aren't very good at retaining liquid