@Hormonella: Wish I could focus on anything with even half the intensity of my dog watching me eat yogurt.
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@GoldenSpirals: Cashier: What does your tattoo say? Me: It doesn't talk. Cashier: Ya, but what does it say? Me: IT DOESN'T TALK. Cashier: Ok, Ma'am.
@sammyrhodes: I wonder if girls got mad on dates in the 1700?s because guys kept checking their treasure maps.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Legal tip for men: if you get a free t shirt at a bar, you're not required to keep it forever, like they can't arrest you if u throw it out.
@markleggett: At the ripe old age of 900, in a universe inhabited by thousands of alien races, I bet Yoda had some pretty racist shit to say.