@AmberTozer: Wish I had a neck like an owl so when a guy is spooning me right after sex I could turn my head all the way around and say that was awful
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@JB4Realz: [Reality TV] HOST: Welcome to America's Next Top Psychic! Please, try not to-- *One contestant stands up*: I WON! H: --ruin it.
@SortaBad: Today I'm approaching teens dressed like I'm from the future, locking eyes, and saying "Happy Presidents Day, sir" with a wink
@girlontapas: Establish dominance by licking the spoon and then putting it back in the mashed potatoes at Thanksgiving dinner.