@zacharyflynn: Wish the trash would take me out for once.
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@Mr_Kapowski: Wife: Where are you going? Me: I'm wearing my robe and boxer briefs so obviously I'm off to fight crime
@mdvaldosta: Ladies: we're not fooled by your PMS trickery. I see how happy you are in those tampon commercials.
@KyleMcDowell86: [commercial for mops] *scene of a man licking up a pool of spilled soda off the dirty floor* "There has to be a better way" Narrator:MOPS