@iGreenMonk: Wish there was a pill I could put in a girl's drink, that would make her do my taxes.
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@Sirrruh: So he says, "Argh! Give me yer booties!" & he steals all the baby booties. ... There's an audience for Baby Blackbeard & I'LL FIND IT.
@GrumpyComments: Batman walks into a Wayne Enterprise meeting and starts talking stocks. He realises he forgot to change. He drops a gas pellet and runs out.
@LurkAtHomeMom: I just saved a bundle on future college tuition by finding out my 4 year old wants to be a gum ball when he grows up.
@Carmel_Coleman: I had a dream I was going to the zoo to throw poop at the monkeys. No, not my own poop, thats just gross. Poop I found on the way to zoo.