@WarrenHolstein: With great power comes great electricity bill.
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@ItsAndyRyan: Bae: Are you coming over? Me: Yes, I'm coming over. - Me and Bae having CB Radio sex
@Brianhopecomedy: My 5 year old hasn't said a word in the car after I convinced him that the volume control on our stereo ejects his car seat.
@Ohaiqtpie: On a poster in my math class "4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions" The sad thing is my first thought was "Oh good, I'm not alone!"
@AlisonChrista: Secretly Canadians love it when people mistake them for Amer- *is decapitated by a hockey stick*