@LittleMissZesty: With me, it's not PRIDE that comes before a fall. It's half a bottle of vodka and a coffee table that I forgot existed.
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@RoosterMustache: ME: snakes are mean TEACHER: right ME: but it's not their fault. They have 2 ends & no legs TEACHER: ok ME: so the ends justify the mean
@stuartrutten: For lunch today, I think I will have a blistering hot bowl of ice cold soup. Thanks microwave.
@TheAlexNevil: Treat her like a princess & she'll love you forever. Unless she's an actual princess. Then she'll just think "I'm being treated normally."
@weinerdog4life: Side effects may include: upset stomach, diarrhea, some wolves will chase you, like 6-12 wolves, it's ok