@Jandalize: With the money I found in the dryer, the girl in me says buy chocolate and candy, but the adult in me says buy beer, chocolate and candy.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@david8hughes: [speaking at funeral] Deceased's brother: there's no words to describe the anguish we all feel right now Me: what about 'anguish'?
@randomnloveit: If they could bottle how good it feels to take off your bra, that would sell for more than any expensive wine.
@Scott_A_Gilmore: What manner of evil contract with the devil must I enter into so I can get eye drops INTO my eyes?