@trevso_electric: Women! Can't live with 'em, can't sell 'em or Liam Neeson will find you and kill you.
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@KateWhineHall: OMG, MY DAUGHTER IS DYING! Oh, my bad, it's just her reaction to having to do a chore.
@pancakemixtape: It's like these credit card companies don't even care that I'm an electric accordionist for South Dakota's finest heavy metal parody band.
@travisauruss: I think the closest I've come to playing romantic music at a girl's window is when I forgot to turn down "Eye Of The Tiger" at the drivethru
@Iwriteforcats: Cats make the best boyfriends because they're soft, loyal, and won't claim they're straight but then turn gay after one lousy date, BRENT!