@juliussharpe: Women, don't tell us about your boyfriend. He's a guy. We know what he's like.
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@steveolivas: 12yo son forgot his electric toothbrush -- so now he has to MOVE HIS ARM to brush his teeth. His protest was legendary.
@loudmouth_usa: I read that if you have 2 hangovers a year you are an alcoholic so I'm around 104 alcoholics
@MavenofHonor: The worst thing about coming home from a trip isn't unpacking, it's the looming threat of nuclear war