@kelkulus: Women I sleep with get so weird when I ask them to sign the guestbook.
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@kingsleyyy: Everyone gets on the fashion industry for unrealistic beauty standards, but can we talk about unrealistic depictions of food on boxes?
@iamspacegirl: [Biblical Times] God: oh shit Angel: what? God: I just realized I've been leaning on the frog button.
@daemonic3: [starbucks] One tall iced latte please "Ok, can I have a name?" Well ok but it really should come from your parents