@Spaced_Cowboy00: Women remember something that happened five years ago. I can't remember why I stood up.
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@CulturedRuffian: Cat 911: What's your emergency? Cat: I knocked everything off the tables now I'm scared! Cat 911: Seriously? Cat: No, LOL! Cat 911: LOL!
@JustDontBugMe: Me: *carrying a heavy bag* Him: Whoa, take it easy. Let me help. M: I’m OK. I'm a strong, independent person. I don't need help. [seconds later] M: *crying* I CAN'T FEEL MY FINGERS!
@Dschnoeb: I bet Egyptians were all like "Yo, nobody in history will ever worship and revere cats like we do" and then came the internet.