@jtswhipped: Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
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@ericsshadow: My son ran away again, but it gets worse. He changed the wifi password before he left.
@chuuew: [BOOK CLUB] ME: So last weeks assignment was Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk. What did everyone think? STEVE: PAUL: JANE: SARAH: MARK: DAVE:
@RandomManik: I stole a seat from an old man and he remarked, "Chivalry is Dead". I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't know. He wasn't even trending on Twitter".
@joshgondelman: My girlfriend and I are thinking about adopting a dog because we've had no luck trying to have one naturally.